Speech by Linda Jakobson at the memorial ceremony for Minister Max Jakobson
the House of the Estates,
Helsinki on 15 March 2013
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President of the Republic, Your excellencies, Ladies and Gentlemen – for the sake of those who do not speak Finnish, including two family members, I will continue in English. My father Max said to me many times that he did not want anyone to glorify his memory after his passing with superficial phrases. So, I will respect his wishes and briefly speak about the values in which Max believed so strongly and which he worked to promote throughout his life. Max was also a very private person, and I wish to respect that too.
Max was a many-layered man. He was a Finn. He was a Jew. He was a citizen of the world. Let me elaborate.
First and foremost, Max was a genuine Finnish patriot. As a young man he fought as a Finnish soldier on the front for three years in the Continuation War. He devoted his entire life to work on behalf of this country in one way or another. Finland's international standing, how Finland should react and adapt to changing geopolitical trends, and how Finland should best pursue its own national interests amidst complex international challenges – these were always on his mind, until the very end of his life.
Jewishness, in turn, was an inherent part of Max though he was not religious. He said so publicly in an interview in 1993. When we moved to Pelham, New York in 1965 Max chose what is called a moderate Jewish synagogue for the family to be members of and to ensure that my brothers and I would receive lessons in the Jewish faith after regular school. He himself went to synagogue on the two holiest days of the year. At the same time, he loved his four grandchildren and son-in-law dearly though none of them are Jews, and for years we all together took part in the annual family Seder dinner at my parent's home. If I had to choose one value that Max was most adamant about, it was tolerance. This tolerance was reflected in his relationships with both family and friends, and indeed with all those with whom he came in contact.
Over the years, Max's Jewish heritage came up, with the insinuation of a contradiction. For Max there was no contradiction. Many people have forgotten that the Muslim nations of the Middle East did not oppose Max's candidacy for Secretary General of the United Nations in 1971.
As a citizen of the world, Max was at home among people of all cultures, races, and religions. He spent his 70th birthday in Beijing in 1993 with the family of a young Chinese man who had become very close to Max and my mother Marilyn after fleeing to Helsinki following the 1989 Tiananmen events. The young man lived with my parents for several months. His family belongs to the Hui Muslim minority, and so, Max's 70th birthday took place at a Chinese Muslim restaurant of the young man's choosing. When Max got out of the car and looked up at the Arabic language sign outside the restaurant, he smiled a bit. ‘This is quite interesting, Finnish, Jewish, Chinese, Muslim’, he said. It was a memorable and warm birthday celebration.
Here in Finland Max's role often focused on interpreting international events and what they would mean for Finland. Outside Finland, in contrast, Max concentrated on explaining Finland's role, Finland's perspective, Finland's policies. In his role as a member of many international organizations, the International Crisis Group and Trilateral Commission, to mention two, Max always wanted to ensure that Finland's voice would be heard.
Max's world view was founded in his belief in the necessity of defending parliamentary democracy, freedom of speech, and the rule of law. There could be no compromises. And he did not merely believe, he was a man of action. He was convinced that every citizen's, every human being's duty is to try and act on behalf of what he or she believes in. As Gideon Bolotowsky said at Max's funeral on Tuesday, Max was true to the Jewish tradition, according to which it is the deeds not creed that matters. There is an apt Finnish expression – “tarttua toimeen” – which is difficult to translate but the best I have come up with is 'seize the moment'. Whether it was something that he felt should be done for a cause that he felt strongly about or for enhancing Finland's international role, Max would not sit still but he would seize the moment. He would act on his convictions.
So though today we are here in sorrow at Max's passing, I know that he would not want us to be gloomy. He exuded optimism and a zest for life.
This desire to have an impact was even evident in his personal life. When my mother Marilyn was diagnosed with Alzheimer's Disease, Max simply refused to accept that nothing could be done. He read everything that was being published about treatment and medication; he signed Marilyn up for a new generation of medicine which had been formally given the green light in the United States but not yet in Finland; and above all he went to extreme lengths to keep Marilyn active. He was determined to keep Marilyn at home as long as possible. For many years, Max for the most part cared for her himself. One doctor said to me that it was because of Max's relentless efforts to keep Marilyn active that Marilyn was able to lead a generally normal life at home for more than ten years, much longer than the doctor had expected. Marilyn passed away last June.
Marilyn was a devoted diplomat's wife throughout her married life. Having said that, I have understood that she struggled initially with Max's conviction that the reintegration of Germany into the European and international community was a prerequisite for lasting peace. In 1954 after my parents as newlyweds settled down in Washington DC, Marilyn had told Max that she will host anyone officially, but please, don't invite any Germans to our home. Once in Washington in the mid-1950s Max phoned her and told her about dinner guests whom he was bringing home that evening. One of the guests was a German diplomat, Baron Axel von dem Bussche-Streithorst. 'But before you get upset', Max had said to Marilyn, ‘let me explain. He was one of the men who was involved in two of Hitler's assassination attempts.' Marilyn relented. The ice was broken. In the years to follow, many many German diplomats and other German citizens were guests in my parents' home. My father was a persistent man when it came to his convictions.
In conclusion, above all, Max was so very proud of this country. He was always contemplating and analyzing Finland's chances to prosper and retain its respected position in the world. One of the most vivid memories I have of my father's comments about Finland in recent years was about Finland's independence. The independence he had been part of fighting for as a young Finnish soldier and the independence that he had done his utmost to protect during the Cold War. In 1997 we were on our customary walk with the dog near my parents' countryside home in Snappertuna and we had been talking generally about the Soviet Union's collapse and Finland's entry into the European Union. Suddenly, Max stopped and said, ‘you know, it is only very recently that I have come to realize that for the first time in its history Finland is now truly independent’.
- The Diplomacy of the Winter War, Harvard University Press 1961